Wednesday, February 21, 2024

That was then...This is now

 That was then, this is now…but later on down the road is when the mix of “then and now” come together. But that simple phrase of distinction of time to what was and to what is, that’s one powerful thing, and then throw in that it gets better after it all comes together and time blends. Could be…as good as anything to pin hopes on. My bestie…wouldn’t know where to begin but we know where it all began and over what flavor of latte to boot but variables, finances, work, those extras we can’t do but we do anyway, and the whole culmination of things that separate what was from what is has stepped up to try to block our path…but what if only a small portion of what was has altered between it and what is…that’s because not all things are designed to change…not all things change simply because time does...I am not of the notion that all things and all people change because time thinks they should…sometimes there is another slice of the pie. This brings me to a personal gap of quicksand and rush to rescue calling my name…

So I guess most folks figure that what was then was destined to change before getting to what now is…valuable things and valuable people do not  have to always change during that period as we move towards the moment when it all meshes together and just keeps going…there is nothing I would change from then or from now with our deep and ever growing friendship…oh yes, we look back at how much fun we had “then” and how we have little time for that “now” but that’s idle chit chat for deep down…way deep down it’s just as grand, if not better, now than it was then…we didn’t change, our bond didn’t change, our focused direction didn’t change…it all evolved instead…so see, not everything or everyone along our path is meant to just change…it isn’t meant to make you yearn for then because now seems so cloudy busy…the universe is unfolding as it should…it always has and it always will and when you stand with that “soulmate friend”…that “you complete me friend” in this time of “this is now” you should have equal or more fond memories as you did when it was “then”…let the eddies of time flow natural and keep tight to that which has traveled with you and has made “what is now” just as precious, priceless, and almost too perfect as it was when it “was then”…for now you know the lines have remained parallel beside each other and that every day is a warm promise that they will continue to do so all the way into “what awaits later” on down the road…consider it riding the colorful waves of a rainbow and splashing into that pot of gold together…all because you didn’t allow “that was then” to dampen or lessen “this is now” and with that being said life will lead you forward for all of the glory moments of “what will be.” 

Pam Scholes

Tuesday, February 13, 2024

Making the Magic Happen...

There is almost nothing as great and as fulfilling and as rewarding as when you make the magic happen for one who has lost their own magic making skills. To me a day of pure success is when you finally sit down and lean back to relax and your heart is running over because you were able to make the magic happen for one that needed it even more than you knew they did. Some folks are inside their own heads silently fighting for their lives and you show up with your "magic wand" and bag of "sparkling joy" and change the entire trajectory of the direction their day was headed in. You can't always make the magic happen but boy oh boy when you can it is absolutely the berries! Let me introduce this magic making agenda in action...

I have a swell friend name John who lives with Myotonic Muscular Dystrophy and without his electric scooter chair he isn't able to get out and do very much so I will get him out to go to the store or lunch or just cruise a bit but today 2/12/2024 was his "double nickels" birthday and I wanted to make it special for him. His mother, who is 88, fell last week and broke her left hip and is currently in a rehab hospital following surgery and they have not seen each other since the 6TH of this month and she worries about him and he worries about her. I check on him daily several times and have spent a few long days visiting his mom, whom I just absolutely love to pieces, making sure she has what she needs and that all things are going as they should and that she is being well tended to. Today was a special day so I took John to Dynasty Asian Restaurant just 6 miles from the rehab/hospital she is in. I did not say one word about taking him to see her so after a huge lunch meal I drove us to see her. I had to wheelchair him to her room since she is way back in the north 40 and that was a hike I knew he could not make. But the reward that melts the heart began as soon as I wheeled him into her room...it was a Norman Rockwell painting...it was a Hallmark happiness card...it was a pure kodak moment and I was privileged to be the only one who got to see them exchange that "I am so glad to see you" look. We had a great visit, snuck her in some fried rice, and the lunch was fabulous and I could feel John's happiness vibe all around him. At the end of the day after a 40 minute ride home John proclaimed that this was his best birthday ever and smiling like a little boy at Christmas...pure joy radiated from him. When I got him settled in at home, before heading to my own home, he gave me a big hug and said: "thank you so much for making my birthday so special cause I had a great, great day!!" Well, I was toast then! I simply told him: "you are more than welcome, and I couldn't be happier that I was able to make it special for you." John spends much time tired, in pain, and just restless so to see him having a big lunch and smiling and joking around was such a treat...and the cherry on top was managing to get him to see her without him realizing it until we had arrived. He needed to see her for himself and know that she is a trooper full of spirit and that she is doing wonderful...he needed to know that, and he just wanted to talk to his mom for a little bit. I love them both very much and somehow it all worked out right on point. So, I sit here now, propped up in bed with my computer in my lap, smiling to myself as I remanence over the day's events and the joy I saw all around them and the fun of his birthday dine in, and my heart is more than satisfied that, for today, I was able to "Make the magic happen..." 

Pam Scholes

Monday, January 29, 2024

The anchors of life...

Ahhhh yes the anchors of life...and that is one simple but very important thing to understand the differences between. See, there are those anchors that are the very things that will do nothing more than drag you down, try to keep you from even treading water any longer, and they will dead stop any movement forward for you...and slowly start to drown you. Some anchors we carry for years without even realizing what is drowning us...clinging us to the same spot every single day! Some anchors we tote around for years hoping to set the issue right, to help that person and/or that thing that is keeping US from being able to move with the flow of OUR life and so those are, appropriately called: 

1) "the anchors that bind you." Now, there is really only one option open to this and that is you must cut the ropes...you must cut loose forever any anchor that is binding you down for that is detrimental to your own growth and severely unfair action from those who are being a binding anchor. You cannot waste any time with being bound down by many things you cannot change anyway...or by people you cannot change either. I am telling you now to get out your scissors, your saw, whatever you have and cut it all loose...if it is keeping you stagnant then let it go, cut it loose and let your ship sail on forward as it should. Do that for yourself...you owe it to yourself...you will later be glad you did it for yourself. It will be tough to cut some anchors due to personal investment but when you are no longer getting any return on that investment then it is time to redirect your energy to more promising avenues. Take a deep breath and cut, cut, cut those ropes...they have probably handed you the scissors themself anyway so cut it quickly and quietly sail on.

Now the other anchors are also appropriately called: 

2) "those that keep us grounded"...those that hold us steady during the worst of the storms of our lives...the waters can be heavy and turbulent and the beams from the lighthouses can be dim or not even visible at all, and in this case we have good anchors...the anchors of life and when you discover and, very luckily and very rarely, find those anchors that pitch in to help make sure that you remain anchored down tightly, until the storm passes and the lighthouse is now visible again to shine light upon your travels, then you must hold tight to those anchors and stick together as the spokes of a wheel stick together. Accept only the anchors that help keep you remain steady during the storms and then pick up and sail on with you...and stand ready at all times to drop anchor again when the next, inevitable, storm hits. Now there will be less of these anchors than those that bind you but the anchors of your life, that turn your tidal waves into rolling ripples that are manageable, now those are the anchors you must keep aboard your ship...it is an investment with such wonderful returns. So, be sure to understand the differences between those anchors out there for only those interested in hunkering down thru the storms so they may move on in the calm that follows are those you graciously keep...the others, the binding anchors...as I said: cut, cut, cut those ropes. They shall sit at the bottom of the ocean floor along with all of the other cut loose anchors while you and your new found anchors of life sail on...

Monday, January 22, 2024

The Trifecta of life…

 

Closing doors, burning bridges, severing longtime ties...they can be a trifecta of tough decisions to have to be on full terms with before you can even begin to properly execute doing any of those things. Let's break it down and please understand that these are solely my feelings and thoughts and boundaries on this trifecta...

1)closing doors sounds easy enough...close the door and don't turn around and now it's "outta sight, outta mind.' But that just isn't so...not at all is it so. You have to know with every fiber of your being that you have done even more than you could have done and more than you should have done has nonetheless been tried before you can, in good faith, let it go...close the door on it like the chapter of a book and don't look back and do not even hear the knocking from the other side...you have to know that when you close a door shut that you must lock it and never open it again. And you must know that you can do that for there will forever be doors we have to muster up and close off and you cannot close those doors properly if your conscience is going to rear up and cause you to question the slamming of that door. You make a command decision, you go with, and that's that...but you make sure that no desire to crack that door has ANY chance to creep up on you for those are revolving doors and they will never stay closed. 

2) Burning bridges along the way...this one is even more firm than closing doors for once you burn a bridge behind you then that is a very solid, forever move. See, once the bridge is burned you can never cross it again...even if you wanted to or even if you needed to. This move of freeing excess baggage of those grey patchy times of our lives takes a silent but certain and confident courage to be able to finally disconnect with anything that hinders you in any way. It's tough to buckle up and be tough sometimes but there is not one single thing lacking in us to make us keep our seat instead of striking the match and watching every board burn into a smoldering heap of ash. Closure reach's no higher level than when one can finally detach themself as numb to the issue and feeling zero regret for what they are about to do nor what they ultimately do. Burning a bridge generally means that what was on the other side of it is dead to you...you have no emotion left to spare. Good thing is, however, that once burned neither can what rest on the other side of the rubble get across it to torment you ever again. It is done, it is over, it has been buried, the bridge can never again be crossed from either side...let it go and forget about it. That's right, forget about it! That was the primary reason for burning the bridge to begin with...to push it away and consider it handled as seen fit and to simply move on and forget about it. So when your own burning season rolls around then think about that bridge long and hard and what it would say if only it could speak before you poor the gas to it and strike a match...be sure you can turn your back to the flames and walk away to a whole new mindset.

3) Ah, and here enters a tough one indeed...severing longtime ties. Wow, now this takes a gamble...you know what you have in someone but yet what you do not have in them seems to outweigh the other then it could be time to freeze frame your very heart and cut the line. It is one tough call to have to make but if it is what is best for you or if it is what is best for both parties then cut the cord. Don't even take a deep breath or do the damn "one, two, three, go!' thing just snip it loose. Life is not designed for us to hang onto everything or everyone forever...those who do stay are but of the "privileged" few. And most times when you reach the point of cutting someone loose, they have handed you the scissors!

So, therein places my two cents and that penny for my thoughts. For some, life will build you so that you will be able to defeat that trifecta while others just seem to have come with an instinct so when your gut of guts tells you to just pause and reflect then do not hesitate for a moment to live by your values, by your morals, by your standards and within your boundaries. You get one ride on this tempest, this merry-go-round that we all twirl about on so keep yourself centered and grounded at all costs. Be prepared to face at least one of the three major parts of life's trifecta traps...but do indeed be prepared

Pam Scholes

Saturday, January 20, 2024

Begin Paving Your Own Yellow Brick Road

 

Your own yellow brick road? Did you shake your head or snicker "yea right?!" to yourself? It's perfectly fine if you did; very understandable since we seem to have so little control over so many things these days...much less a yellow brick road. But you absolutely can build it! The berries about it all are that you may build it in any straight and narrow form that you wish...or you may build it in any curve and twist shape that you wish...and you may build it at any pace (almost any pace) that you wish. In fact, it's not so much how much time one takes in building their road...it's far more important in how much was accomplished during their time building their road. Quality over quantity; and may quality always win. 
 You are the brick layer that gently places each brick in its chosen spot...you are the cement that binds each of those bricks together...you are the blueprint designer of every shape and size of each of those bricks...and you are the orchestrator that shall decide to which musical tune of direction those bricks shall march towards...
 The bricks that pave your own inner yellow brick road are very special bricks for each one is made up of a pinch, a snippet, a dab, a quirk of you...they are made so that each one holds some personal and unique touch that is the very essence of you! And with all of those "titles and duties" bestowed upon you I, hereby and from this moment forward, knight you full and sole guardianship over the magical path you carve from your many bricks of gold. 
 Timing and placement will mean everything since this brick road is an everyday, ongoing, work in progress kind of endeavor. Oh, fret not for those cracks and patchy areas along the way are all compliments of life and those unforeseeable variables that will rear their heads to hinder the flow of the road we have begun. Allow no pebble to take roost in the spot of where the next brick should be placed. 
Building your yellow brick road, making no claim for it to be an easy job, but oh my, the rewards you shall reap will shine for you when all is said and done. And so, as 2024 has now gotten comfortable it is now time to pave...time to reinvent yourself, and/or, your route of travel. Just because things change does not mean one must change with them...one must simply accept those changes exist and modify them into the parts of their life that truly count, that truly matter. You have a god (however you conceive that to be) given right to "free will" which opens many doors for the foundation of the production of your very own yellow brick road...it has been inside of you all along.

Saturday, August 1, 2015

In light of things...

Pamela Scholes


            Depending on where you are it is either early or late as I sit in the quiet and dark of the Atlanta skyline at 2:00am-I can not sleep. I have been awake just pondering so many things and in light of things there is much to ponder. The world is on center stage and yet no one seems to be maintaining their part. Every one must participate and become a part of this movement we call Life.
             I do not know things backslid in to the state they are in nor do I understand how some of these things can possibly be justified. I sat here wondering what news was breaking at that moment far and wide that I would see on the 6:00am news. We have gotten entirely too much negative reaction and a poor level of positive action. We have pedaled backwards in so many areas and i can not grasp how we as a people could just sit by and watch so much that was fought for just now become amendments.
              I am not ashamed to say that we have lost sight, not the way but the visual of where we want to go. People are so confused, frustrated, and just put out that humanity has taken a downward spiral. I have days when some small action occurs that restores a small piece of my faith in humanity. Those are the moments we should breathe for-those of human kindness. An extended hand can move mountains when one knows they are not alone. And people, we are not alone for we are all here and like it or not these are the cards we have been dealt but we don't have to be alone-unity is just as simple.
               We are back to living in a world of survival by any means necessary and without care or regard for the consequences. Things loom large but we must choose to see the beauty instead of the ugly. We have to believe that we each matter enough to push forth for change for the ball has been dropped. Let us step up to the plate and take a swing. What harm could it do in light of things...

Saturday, September 6, 2014

The Voice of "We the people..."

written by: Pamela Scholes


       I wish I could say that this is an easy post for me as it means I am going to have to do some finger pointing for somewhere down the line someone is responsible for actions, reactions, and non-actions. I have asked my friends and social media followers to please voice their opinions with me to help me write this blog. This isn't about me, it is about us- "We the people..."I thank those who kindly lent me their thoughts so I am here to be their voice. It was my promise.
       As those of you who have roamed about my blog page know that I do not dabble in politics or religion but I am here as a voice for many and sadly, that voice is about this country. It is about what is happening to America the beautiful and what is happening that is combating the growth of the land of opportunity? Now, I could run with this far and wide but I am here for you, all of you, because someone has to be and someone needs to be. You are important and your thoughts matter.
       The thoughts of feedback that came to me when I posted the question of what each person would change first if they were given the chance to change one thing in this land of ours. The replies that came from all over the United States saddened me because it became crystal clear how many people are truly just getting by. And what about the other ones, the ones not getting by at all who will, after enough time, no longer care about even getting by- we call them the homeless. They are among us, they are our people, they could be us and for whatever reasons they are there, there is no excuse for a government to allow such a thing to even exist. No person in this country should be without food, shelter, and a chance to make a life they can be proud of. Sadly, those are not God given rights they are government given rights and can be changed at any time in the game. The world has become a chess game and "we the people" are pawns.
         Welfare, I don't even know where to begin on that one. It was devised as a simple system and program to help people get by while trying to help place them in a job. It was to offer some one their chance to make it or lose it but at least they had the chance. We are meant to help those who can not help themselves and the original Welfare program offered just that but that was back when people still cared about one another, back when a helping hand wasn't hard to find. Dont remember this time-that's because it has been a long time ago; seems ancient history.
            We have been made promises that are seldom kept, we have simple questions but the buck never stops. We have real issues concerning real people and as a government the blind eyes have got to stop closing or looking the other way, no situation just goes away without being tended to. When does a better day come? When will things be said and done in a way that makes sense? The homeless-why?-we made many of them that way. Welfare?- what significent move has it made in policy to continue to better those who need it. We could go around this thing for a very long time and I in no way mean any harm or offense but I do not have control of how the truth makes someone feel.I mean, ask a simple question to any government official about an ongoimg issue and just see how mant times you get pushed off. You are given to someone who always has to clarify with someone else. That puts up a red flag with me that it means that no one really knows.
           I am not looking to be wrong or right for there is this grey area and that is where I believe and my responses believe that we are stuck. Our forefathers made things so simple. They stuck firmly to a plan that came from a blank page of paper and a feather pen; and they took that and built a country. They knew they didn't know everything but they knew it would not be learned at the expense of the people. My, that's pretty powerful for a time so long ago but they believed in where they could go. They made it so that there could be an american dream and a land of the beautiful and I am inclined to believe that this is not what they had in mind..
           There is little to no explanation to most of our problems but there is one root that much of it stems from-hatred. We spend ten times more energy hating than we do trying to figure out how to live in harmony. It is a sad epic saga when a country has created much of its own misery and I think that the government overlooks far too many small issues; handle those and there will be less large issues.WE, us out here in this world every day is who this country was founded by and for-its people.
           Where have our standards disappeared to? and why compare one country with another when there will always be differences but we don't have to let this create disruption any longer. And all of the speeches and debates simply are: if they can't sell it to you then they want to make you afraid of it. If you have a cause then tell it, take back your piece of your country and lay claim to your self respect. Be who it is you want to be and do not allow these grand issues to steal your happiness.The government thinks that if they can keep us seperated then we can be easier dealt with. It's a false bill of goods we have been sold, and the policy is "as is". I ponder often about the place we call home and I am just not sure when it all begin to go wrong, but what counts is the voice of "WE the people..."